How to Introduce Sex Toys to a Woman

So you are starting to get to the point in your relationship where you are interested in introducing sex toys to the bedroom.  Bravo!  But first let’s go over a couple of ground rules.  Let’s talk about the proper way to introduce sex toys to a woman.

Forget the Past

Whatever you do, do not talk about how much fun you had using sex toys with another woman.  This is not and i repeat NOT going to help your cause or make her more likely to be “cool” with this idea.  She might start using sex toys a whole lot more but it isn’t going to be with you.

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Be Patient

Please, if this is a girl you are dating and not your wife or long time girlfriend be patient.  I would say make sure you have had sex at least 10 times before you start thinking about introducing toys.

Show Your Cards

If you wait till things are starting to heat up in bed before you reach for the sex toy, you may encounter some resistance.  If you have a night stand stocked full of condoms, toys and vibrators, it could give the wrong first impression.  Most women will already know that you have had other partners, but they probably don’t want to be reminded of it in the heat of the moment.

If you really want to play it safe, I recommend buying a brand new vibrator as a gift.  This will make your woman much more comfortable and likely to agree.  You wouldn’t want to wear used underwear would you?  Having her open the packaging of a brand new vibrator is the only way she will know for sure she’s not getting someone’s sloppy seconds.

[Related: How to Choose the Right Vibrator]

Be Aware Of Health Concerns

One of the most important accessories in your ‘toy box’ should be a sex toy cleaner, and you should use it each and every time you lug them out of their hiding place.  Dishwasher water can be too hot, and household soaps might break down the material of many an expensive toy in just a few washes.  Instead, get a lint-free cloth and a bottle of sex toy cleaner to keep it on hand.

Follow these simple guidelines when you decide to introduce sex toys to set yourself up for success.  If you aren’t sure where to start, browse around my site.  See what looks interesting.  If you like the sex toy she probably will too.  Or you can jump straight to my post the 3 Best Sex Toys for Couples.

*Portions of this post were taken from an article originally written by .  She is a world renowned sex advice expert and creator of the , a comprehensive program guaranteed to elevate your sex life to monumental heights.  (My husband and I have really enjoyed testing her program.)


  1. Jon December 23, 2015
  2. Bryant October 22, 2018

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